Self Help

15 Tools to Turn the Tide - Seth Freeman

Author Photo

Matheus Puppe

· 53 min read

“If you liked the book, you can purchase it using the links in the description below. By buying through these links, you contribute to the blog without paying any extra, as we receive a small commission. This helps us bring more quality content to you!”



Here is a summary of the introduction:

[Your Notes]

The introduction describes a scenario where the manager Shanice receives a call from a client wanting a project delivered in half the original time. This puts major pressure on the manager and team. It then asks how one could turn such a situation around through negotiation when feeling powerless.

It notes that negotiation is difficult, especially under pressure and adversity. It lists common challenges negotiators face like intimidating counterparts, time pressure, stressed colleagues, and feeling unable to push back or say no.

It explains that while principles of negotiation are important, what matters more is being able to apply them in real situations under stress. Our minds go blank under pressure. It draws parallels to how other professions use tools like checklists and acronyms to perform well in high-pressure situations.

It introduces the idea that negotiators need similar tools - acronyms, checklists, roleplays etc. that help deploy insights even when flooded with stress or feeling the least influential. Tools not only help cope with stress but are important learning aids, making principles digestible and portable.

In summary, the introduction sets up that the book will provide negotiation “tools” to help apply principles and perform well specifically when under pressure, short on time, or feeling powerless - the situations we need them most.

  • The passage discusses various tools and strategies that can help people effectively navigate challenging negotiations and turn difficult situations around.

  • The first tool discussed is called “Three Little Words” - Interests, Facts, Options. This tool involves focusing the discussion on stakeholders’ underlying interests, establishing agreed-upon facts, and brainstorming new options to resolve conflicts or crises.

  • Other tools that will be covered include preparing thoroughly in advance using techniques like roleplaying and creating an action plan (“I FORESAW IT”), bringing a one-page overview of key topics/targets/tradeoffs, identifying helpful allies, and finding a compatible negotiation counterpart.

  • Real-life stories will be shared of people who used these techniques to successfully resolve issues like saving a failing business deal, negotiating a better record contract, and more. Both professional and personal contexts will be explored.

  • The overall message is that having the right strategic “tools” or approaches can significantly improve outcomes in challenging negotiations and disputes, even when the odds seem stacked against you. Preparation, understanding interests, establishing facts, and exploring new options are presented as especially important tactics.

The manager, Shanice, was facing an impossible deadline from their biggest client to deliver a welcome screen for new software in just 30 days. This was causing arguments in her design team about what could be done.

Shanice turned the discussion around by asking why questions. She asked why the client needed it in 30 days and what their real concerns were. This revealed that the client needed the welcome screen to launch a new health care center pilot in 30 days.

She then asked if there was any way they could help the client launch in 30 days even if the software wasn’t fully ready. This got the team brainstorming options instead of arguing.

Shanice had Dave, the boss, call the client Betty back. When Dave confirmed the client’s need was to launch the pilot, Shanice prompted Dave to propose an option - that key features wouldn’t be done for 2 months, but they could help manually in the interim and lend staff to perform tasks during the launch.

The client Betty was thrilled, as this gave her a solution to propose internally. In the end, the client was more excited to work with Shanice’s firm, calling them “rock stars,” even though they didn’t end up needing the interim help.

Shanice turned a potential crisis into a triumph by getting the team focused on understanding the client’s interests and brainstorming options, rather than arguing about positions and deadlines. This improved the client relationship significantly.

  • The post discusses tips and strategies for purchasing agents to navigate business challenges, worries, and constraints. It covers topics like negotiating contracts and dealing with landlords.

  • It recommends doing research to understand the other party’s interests, constraints, and financial situation. Suggested research methods include reviewing financials, talking to lawyers, reading public information about the company, and following industry journals/reports.

  • After understanding interests and facts, the next step is to brainstorm multiple options that could satisfy both parties. Experienced negotiators typically come up with 5-6 or more options per topic.

  • Generating a variety of options improves the chances of finding agreements that work well for both sides. Options can be big or small parts of an overall package.

  • The Three Little Words approach of understanding interests, learning facts, and developing creative options is highlighted as an effective strategy for overcoming common business challenges in a way that keeps relationships positive.

  • Examples are given of international conflicts that were resolved using this approach, like disputes over water rights between Israel and Jordan, and control of the Sinai Peninsula between Israel and Egypt.

So in summary, it provides tips and strategies for purchasing agents dealing with constraints, along with emphasizing the Three Little Words negotiation method of interests, facts and options. Real-world examples demonstrate how this approach can resolve seemingly intractable conflicts.

  • In 1978, control of the Sinai Peninsula was a major sticking point in negotiations between Egypt and Israel.

  • Egypt’s Anwar Sadat said Egypt wanted sovereignty over the Sinai - Egyptian maps, flag, and civilian settlements. Military presence was not essential.

  • Israel’s Menachem Begin said Israel needed security and a buffer zone with no opposing military forces.

  • They proposed a solution - Egypt could have sovereignty as it wanted, but both sides agreed most of the Sinai would have no military forces, creating a buffer zone. Satellite imaging would help Israel monitor any Egyptian troop movements. Both leaders agreed to this.

  • This breakthrough removed a major stumbling block and helped lead to the 1978 Camp David Accords, ending hostilities between Egypt and Israel. All three leaders - Sadat, Begin and US President Carter - won the Nobel Peace Prize. The peace between Egypt and Israel has now lasted for decades.

So in summary, defining each side’s interests in control of the Sinai (sovereignty vs security) and creatively solving both needs led to an historic peace agreement between Egypt and Israel.

  • The Three Little Words methodology of focusing on Interests, Facts, and Options has been shown to be effective in many settings beyond just management, including selling and fundraising.

  • Research on 35,000 sales calls found that asking questions to understand the customer’s situation and interests, rather than pitching the product, was much more effective in complex sales. This “consultative selling” focuses on listening for the customer’s interests.

  • A fundraising example showed how understanding a corporate donor’s interests in marketing and opportunities to participate in an event helped increase their donation five-fold, despite a recession.

  • The approach can also be used to reinvent industries by identifying unmet customer interests beyond just price and offering new options to meet those interests, as one poultry company did in transforming the chicken industry.

  • Focusing on interests, facts, and options allows for creative solutions and shows that there is no such thing as a true commodity business where companies compete only on price. The Three Little Words methodology provides a framework for effective negotiation, management, selling, fundraising and reinventing industries.

The I FORESAW IT framework is a tool for having a structured, well-prepared negotiation or difficult conversation. It helps uncover opportunities, understand all perspectives, and increase the chances of a successful outcome.

The letters in I FORESAW IT stand for questions to ask oneself before and during the negotiation:

I - Interests F - Factual research O - Options R - Rapport, reactions, responses E - Empathy and ethics
S - Setting and scheduling A - Alternatives to agreement W - Who (influencers) I - Independent criteria T - Topics, targets, tradeoffs

Asking these questions reveals hidden information, understands motivations, discovers creative solutions, anticipates objections, considers ethical issues, prepares logistics, plans alternatives if needed, identifies outside influencers, and sets benchmarks.

It provides a structured process and comprehensive analysis to ensure the negotiator is fully prepared. This increases confidence and improves performance. It also helps all parties understand each other better and find mutually agreeable outcomes.

The example given shows how one negotiator used I FORESAW IT to discover an innovative solution to a $20 million problem, saving the merger and protecting multiple careers. So in summary, it is a very useful framework for any high-stakes or complex negotiation.

  • Diego successfully negotiated a deal with Acme that saved his division and company over $5 million in costs.

  • He used a systematic preparation method called I FORESAW IT to get ready for the negotiations.

  • I FORESAW IT stands for Interests, Factual research, Options, Rapport, Reactions, Settlements. It guides the preparatory thinking.

  • Diego focused first on factual research to understand Acme’s perspective and identify shared interests in cutting costs.

  • He got buy-in from key executives at Acme by addressing their specific interests and concerns, such as shareholder value.

  • Systematic preparation through I FORESAW IT helped Diego feel confident and able to deal with challenges that came up in the negotiation.

  • Proper preparation is highlighted as one of the most important factors for successful negotiations. I FORESAW IT provides a structured way to prepare without creating any financial issues.

  • Anticipate what the seller may say and draft potential responses that channel the conversation constructively rather than arguing. For example, if the seller says a policy prohibits negotiating, you could ask about bulk discounts.

  • Put yourself in the seller’s shoes - understand their perspective and constraints to build empathy and trust. Consider their political situation within their organization.

  • Consider any ethical dilemmas either side may face and set limits for yourself. Take time for reflection to remain patient and compassionate.

  • Plan negotiation logistics like location, timing, medium of communication. Consider neutral vs public spaces and deadlines. Setting and scheduling are often preliminary negotiable issues.

  • List your alternatives if no deal is reached (BATNA) and the seller’s alternatives (your other options, not just your first idea). Identify both parties’ worst alternative (WATNA) to put offers in context.

  • Identify who else could influence the outcome, like stakeholders, regulators, or the seller’s managers. Consider whether agents or mediators would be helpful.

The key aspects are preparing responses, seeing the other perspective, planning logistics, understanding alternatives on both sides, and accounting for other influencing parties. The goal is a constructive discussion rather than argument.

  • I FORESAW IT is a mnemonic that helps negotiators systematically prepare for negotiations by considering important factors. The letters stand for Interests, Facts, Options, Relationships/Rapport, Endpoints, Self-Knowledge, and What’s important for them.

  • It provides a mental checklist to see the negotiation from different angles and find non-obvious, evidence-based solutions. Negotiators report feeling more confident and open after using it.

  • Even in deeply emotional conflicts like grief, I FORESAW IT can help you avoid lashing out or giving up by giving a better “third choice” - it equipped one man to negotiate compassionately with his deceased fiancée’s father.

  • You don’t need to memorize it, just have the prompt available. It’s a preparation guide, not a script. The map helps you navigate any situation that arises.

  • Starting constructively by getting reacquainted, listening, and setting a tone is often wise. Setting an agenda can also help for major talks.

  • Over-preparing using I FORESAW IT could potentially make one less willing to walk away from a bad offer. Experienced negotiators avoid this by using it to continually evaluate alternatives and criteria.

  • The chapter discusses how to use the I FORESAW IT negotiation framework even in emergency situations when you have little time to prepare.

  • It provides an example of a woman named Myra who was able to negotiate successfully with an airline manager to get on another flight when her original flight was canceled, even though she only had 30 minutes to prepare. She was able to identify interests, options, etc. using I FORESAW IT.

  • It also provides an example of a student who used I FORESAW IT in 15 minutes with his family when they arrived at an overbooked hotel. The example walks through the student’s I FORESAW IT plan covering interests, research, options, rapport strategies, empathy, alternatives, topics/tradeoffs, etc.

  • Having even a brief I FORESAW IT plan can help in urgent negotiations by providing a framework to strategize, identify leverage points, remain calm and solutions-oriented, and have concrete suggestions or options to propose to the other side. While preparation time is limited, utilizing the key elements of I FORESAW IT can still help save the situation.

The passage discusses seven ways to use the mnemonic “I FORESAW IT” to help prepare for a negotiation or conflict situation when under time pressure. They include:

  1. Pick a few key letters from IFORESAWIT to focus on initially.

  2. Ask friends/colleagues to help divide up and work on different parts of the mnemonic together.

  3. Teach others the mnemonic so they can help in the future.

  4. Treat it as a set of interview questions and ask an expert to provide guidance on the different elements.

  5. Reuse and revise past plans where similar issues arise.

  6. Mentally run through the mnemonic to prepare even without writing things down.

  7. Whispering the mnemonic can help activate higher-level thinking.

It then provides examples of using the mnemonic to negotiate with bureaucrats more effectively by learning their specific language, policies, and interests in order to find solutions that meet their requirements. Speaking in their terminology can help achieve favorable outcomes.

  • Learning to understand the constraints that bureaucracies face, like rules requiring them to favor certain suppliers, can help you negotiate with them more effectively.

  • The mnemonic I FORESAW IT suggests asking what the bureaucrat has authority to do rather than what they can’t do, in order to find potential solutions. It also advises focusing on understanding their interests and exploring options.

  • Researching how an organization is structured and who has decision-making power can help you find the right person to talk to. Avoid sharing too many details with the wrong person who lacks authority.

  • I FORESAW IT can be used to respond effectively to “sharp tactics” like limited authority claims, bluffs, good cop/bad cop routines, killer questions, and commitment tactics.

  • It suggests gathering facts, testing claims, exploring interests and alternatives, involving the right decision-makers, and avoiding traps rather than confrontation. The goal is finding solutions, not humiliation.

  • Mastering I FORESAW IT gives you tools to help mentor and counsel others on effective negotiation strategies.

The passage discusses using a “play sheet” or “one-pager” as a negotiating tool to help stay focused and prepared. Some key points:

  • Coaches use laminated play sheets on the sidelines to help call quick, effective plays under pressure.

  • Astronaut Buzz Aldrin had a checklist sewn into his sleeve while walking on the moon, likely to keep tasks/priorities in mind.

  • Veteran astronaut Chris Hadfield would create a “one-pager” boiling down everything learned about a critical system, to help solve any crisis that arises in one breath in an emergency situation.

  • A negotiation “play sheet” or “topics, targets & tradeoffs grid” can similarly help negotiate effectively by keeping priorities, issues, positions, and tradeoffs organized in a single page reference.

  • It helps stay focused, poised, create and claim value, ensure the negotiation team is aligned, manage multiple issues across meetings, track progress, clarify mandates, and prepare for competitive negotiations on specific issues.

The passage suggests using a condensed, well-organized “one-pager” can equip negotiators with the readiness and focus needed to navigate high-pressure negotiations effectively.

Here is a summary of the provided text:

The text describes a negotiation tool called the Topics, Targets, and Tradeoffs (TTT) grid. The TTT grid helps summarize key preparation for high-stakes negotiations into a simple chart. It captures important aspects of successful negotiations like opportunities, power dynamics, and confidence.

The grid has four columns: Topics, Targets, Tradeoffs Between Topics, and Tradeoffs Within Topics. The Topics column lists the issues to be discussed. The Targets column identifies desired targets or ranges for each issue. The Tradeoffs columns identify potential trades or creative solutions between and within issues.

The TTT grid acts as a “glance-and-go” decision tool during negotiations. It can ease cognitive load and provide guidance under pressure similar to checklists used by pilots, surgeons, and military commanders. Experienced negotiators report referring to their TTT grid to stay focused on key priorities and opportunities.

The text provides a hypothetical example negotiation using a sample TTT grid. It describes how glancing at the grid informed the negotiator’s strategies and counteroffers, helping achieve a mutually satisfactory outcome that met their own priorities. In summary, the TTT grid is presented as a simple yet powerful preparation and decision-making tool for high-stakes negotiations.

Best Target:

  • Your ambitious but realistic goal for each topic
  • Grounded in research of what is reasonably achievable
  • Not a wild guess, based on evidence of what others have achieved
  • Not your first offer, but what you truly hope to get


  • The worst outcome you are willing to accept for each topic
  • Based on your BATNA (Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement)
  • The point at which you would be better walking away from the deal
  • Helps you avoid bad deals and know when to say “stop”

Tradeoffs Between Topics:

  • Rank your priorities for the different topics
  • Allows you to create value by trading things you care less about for things you care more

Tradeoffs Within Topics:

  • List creative options for each topic to overcome impasse
  • Satisfy the other side’s interests in alternative ways
  • Having options keeps you persistently creative

Package Offers:

  • Create packaged offers that cover all topics together
  • Fosters discussion of creative trades that make both sides happier
  • Counterintuitively, better than negotiating topics one by one

Here are the key points from the passage:

  • Negotiating single issues separately (distributive bargaining) can lead to more arguments, while packaging issues together (integrative bargaining) reduces arguments by allowing trades.

  • The Targets, Topics, and Trade-offs (TTT) grid helps negotiate packages by preparing opening offers, identifying worst acceptable offers, and creating creative offers that bundle multiple issues.

  • When creating an opening offer, it’s important to “cushion” or offer more than your best target on at least one issue. This allows room for concessions to meet targets.

  • Identifying a worst acceptable offer provides a “bright line test” or bottom line to know when to reject counteroffers.

  • A creative packaged offer bundles issues using trade-offs to foster collaborative problem solving.

  • Even for single-issue negotiations, the targets section of the TTT grid prepares opening offers and identifies targets.

  • Changing the scope of issues by narrowing or broadening the agenda can shift power balances in negotiations.

  • The TTT grid helps negotiators understand and coordinate their mandate when representing a principal.

  • Sharing a TTT grid in advance helps negotiation teams align their positions and avoid miscommunications, especially important for remote video negotiations.

The passage discusses using a Topics, Targets, and Trades (TTT) grid to effectively manage complex, lengthy contract negotiations. It suggests that negotiators meet beforehand to:

  1. Roleplay different scenarios to prepare.

  2. Assign roles like “good cop, bad cop”.

  3. Create a TTT grid together to identify the top issues/topics and determine ideal, acceptable, and worst case positions for each.

  4. Anticipate questions from the other side and prepare responses.

  5. Ensure everyone is on the same page and ready to present a coordinated strategy during the negotiation.

The goal is for the negotiators to enter the discussion well-prepared and focused on the most important issues, rather than feeling overwhelmed by a long, complex contract. A collaborative pre-meeting allows them to strategize effectively as a team.

Here is a summary of the key points about most events of default and the right to further assurances within 5 days:

  • An event of default refers to specific events or conditions that allow one party to a contract to terminate the agreement or collect damages due to the other party’s non-performance. Common events of default include failing to make required payments, breaching a material obligation, filing for bankruptcy, etc.

  • The right to further assurances refers to one party’s ability to request the other party to provide reasonable assurance that it will perform its obligations under the contract when reasonable grounds arise for insecurity about performance.

  • If reasonable grounds for insecurity arise, a party has the right to request further written assurances of performance within a commercially reasonable time, usually 5 days or less depending on the situation and jurisdiction.

  • If the other party fails to provide adequate assurances within the specified time period, it is considered an anticipatory repudiation of the contract, allowing the insecure party to suspend its own performance and/or sue for damages.

So in summary, events of default allow termination or damages for non-performance, while the right to further assurances allows a party to request adequate proof of performance within a short time period if reasonable insecurity arises.

Here is a summary of the key points about roleplaying from the passage:

  • Roleplaying is a negotiation skill that involves practicing simulated negotiations in order to better prepare for real negotiations. It helps negotiators get comfortable in difficult situations.

  • The recommended method is called “Roleplay, Review, Resume” - where negotiators take turns roleplaying different sides of the negotiation, pausing to give feedback and suggestions, then resuming the roleplay.

  • Thorough preparation is important before roleplaying to ensure it is useful. Negotiators should create briefing materials like an “I FORESAW IT” plan for their role.

  • Roleplaying is especially useful for preparing to negotiate with intimidating “Godzilla” counterparts who may be aggressive or difficult.

  • Crisis negotiators also use intensive roleplaying with stress-inducing scenarios to become comfortable handling high-pressure situations.

  • If no partner is available, negotiators can still benefit from roleplaying both sides of the negotiation alone or recording themselves to review later.

  • The goal of roleplaying is to ready yourself emotionally through practice and familiarize yourself with what to expect in the real negotiation.

The passage discusses using a strategy of building power and leverage away from direct negotiations with a difficult counterpart, referred to as a “Godzilla”. It advocates making deals with other parties to gradually improve one’s position before engaging with the Godzilla again.

It introduces the concept of using the negotiation preparation tool “Who I FORESAW” to identify potential allies, sources of information, trading partners, influencers, alternatives, and the sequence of interactions with them. This allows one to strengthen their position through a series of smaller deals before the main negotiation.

As an example, it outlines how a woman named Hannah used this approach in planning a warehouse project. She identified additional stakeholders she could work with beyond just the main customer she was struggling to negotiate with. She then scheduled meetings and negotiated smaller concessions from other stakeholders like the city government and landowner to improve the viability of her project. This strengthened her leverage for the key negotiation.

The summary focuses on how the passage discusses building momentum and power away from direct negotiations through a step-by-step process of incremental deal-making with other relevant parties. This allows one to go back to the main difficult counterpart from a position of greater strength.

  • Hannah gained confidence by securing deals with several midsize customers for her proposed warehouse. She was able to offer them lower rents by telling them she was close to signing a major customer (Bening).

  • Hannah had an off-the-record conversation with an influential newspaper columnist, Dan Archer, who had previously criticized developers. She convinced him her warehouse would include green features by sharing details from an ecology professor. Dan hinted he would not criticize her project.

  • With these successes building her credibility and leverage, Hannah returned to negotiations with Bening’s representatives. She was able to make a more compelling case due to lower economic risks and more customer interest. She also noted a competitor was interested if Bening declined.

  • Impressed by Hannah’s new position and not wanting negative publicity, Bening reduced its demands and Hannah secured an excellent deal with more favorable terms.

  • Hannah was able to turn the negotiation to her advantage by making strategic moves away from the main table, like securing support from other customers and influencing outside parties like the newspaper columnist. This strengthened her hand in the key negotiation with Bening.

Here are the key points from the summary:

  • Kettering had a brilliant idea for an air-cooled automobile engine but GM never adopted it despite GM backing him on other inventions.

  • The main reason was that Kettering failed to build sufficient political support and alliances within GM’s organizational structure. As divisions had autonomy, the division heads opposed ideas not originating from within their divisions.

  • Kettering should have focused more on cultivating allies at various levels within GM, like engineers, dealers, suppliers, to build momentum for the idea. Forming networks of supporters is important for overcoming organizational resistance.

  • His technical skills were not the problem - it was a failure to navigate the politics within the large organization. Greater focus on building relationships and alliances could have helped win approval for the air-cooled engine design.

  • The summary then contrasts two approaches - networking broadly vs targeted negotiation, where the focus is finding the best possible supporter or partner through a process of filtering and research.

The Win Warmly Recipe Card is a negotiation tool that can be used when you fear doing poorly compared to your counterpart or leaving them feeling resentful, and when you need to achieve a valuable and favorable deal.

The tool guides you to truthfully reassure your counterpart that you want them to do well, while also speaking to create a “good for them, very good for us” deal. The goal is to find an agreement that benefits both sides.

The tool is illustrated through an example of three executives, Abel, Baker and Charlie, who are competing for a promotion based on negotiating deals with key customers. When Abel returns with a $9,000 deal, higher than the customer’s initial $6,000 offer but lower than the boss’s $15,000 target, the boss is unhappy.

However, using the Win Warmly approach, Abel is able to justify the $9,000 deal by emphasizing that it is a significant increase for the customer from their initial position, and also still beneficial for the company, finding a middle ground that satisfies both parties to some degree. The tool aims to avoid leaving either side feeling resentful through a cooperative rather than competitive approach.

  • The boss has three employees negotiating deals - Baker, Charlie, and Abel.

  • Baker returns with a deal that creates $20,000 in revenue but only gets them $8,000. The boss is unhappy they didn’t get more.

  • Charlie returns with a deal for $19,999 but the customer texts the boss afterward saying they’ll never do business with them again because Charlie “bled them dry”.

  • The boss is frustrated that no one can negotiate a good deal that also keeps the customer happy.

  • The passage argues that solely focusing on competitively claiming as much value as possible or solely focusing on collaboration can both backfire.

  • It advocates for “Winning Warmly” - creating a lot of value while also claiming a favorable portion without being greedy. This allows both sides to be satisfied.

  • It presents a “Winning Warmly Recipe Card” with three steps: cushion your first offer, especially cushion offers on your most important topics, and signal willingness to be creative. The goal is to negotiate competitively while also fostering goodwill and cooperation.

  • The passage discusses strategies for signaling a willingness to be collaborative and creative in negotiations. It recommends framing any offers or suggestions in a thoughtful preface that establishes you have listened to the other side’s concerns, shared some of your own interests, and are flexible and solution-focused rather than demanding a specific outcome.

  • It suggests packaging multiple issues together in offers rather than addressing them one by one, to allow for trades and creative solutions. The first offer should be presented as a suggestion and leave room for modification.

  • The “5% rule of thumb” is introduced as a guideline for setting ambitious but not greedy targets. It recommends worsening your ideal or “best target” outcome by 5% to avoid appearing greedy and impairing relationships. This still allows for making a more generous initial offer while cushioning that position.

  • The passage provides an example of how the 5% rule could be applied in negotiating the sale price of a boat. It distinguishes between the best target, initial offer amount, and how much that offer is cushioned or flexible.

  • In summary, the key recommendations are to signal collaboration, make packaged suggestions rather than demands, apply the 5% rule for targets, and cushion initial offers to leave room for compromise.

  • The chapter introduces the “Exactly! Challenge” tool for negotiating with angry or volatile counterparts.

  • It discusses the movie Moana, where the character Moana faces a raging volcanic demon but calms it down by understanding its true identity and placing the heart stone in its chest.

  • A real-life example is given of psychologist Marshall Rosenberg facing anger from a Palestinian man at a talk. Rather than responding angrily, Rosenberg acknowledged the man’s valid concerns about lack of resources and suffering of children. This diffused the man’s anger and they had a productive 20-minute dialogue.

  • The lesson is that when facing rage, understanding the other perspective and acknowledging legitimate concerns, without reacting angrily oneself, can help de-escalate tensions and foster actual understanding and connection. It shows one looking at the heart of the issue rather than just the surface anger.

  • The “Exactly! Challenge” tool suggests using this approach - understanding the other’s perspective rather than just their emotional expression - to handle negotiations with angry or volatile counterparts more effectively and resolve difficult conflicts. The goal is to diffuse tensions and foster real connections.

The passage introduces the “Exactly! Challenge” as a technique for active listening and conflict resolution. It involves periodically paraphrasing or recapping what the other person said and asking if you understood correctly by saying “exactly.”

The key benefits of this technique are that it shows you are listening and trying to understand, lowers stress and tension in conflicts, builds trust, reveals misunderstandings, and satisfies the basic human need to feel heard. It is especially useful in high-stress situations like negotiations or when dealing with hostile individuals.

The passage provides tips for using the Exactly! Challenge effectively, such as making eye contact, not rehearsing your response, focusing fully on understanding the other, and practicing recapping on your own. It also introduces an advanced version called “affect labeling” where you name the emotions the other seems to be feeling to connect on an emotional level.

Overall, the passage promotes active listening and the Exactly! Challenge as a simple but powerful tool that can help de-escalate conflicts, build understanding between parties, and make negotiations and difficult conversations more productive.

  • Reframing means conveying an idea in a way that respects the other person’s feelings and interests, rather than using aggressive or irritating language. It allows you to be truthful while also showing respect.

  • Skilled negotiators avoid irritating statements and reframing instead. Common irritators include claiming an offer is fair when pushing for acceptance, dismissing the other person’s position, or accusing them of bluffing.

  • Examples are given of reframing common irritators into statements that are “hard on the problem, soft on the person.” This involves taking care with word choice to avoid triggering defensiveness.

  • Reframing requires intentionally validating some aspect of the other person, like their dignity or vision, even if you disagree with their position. It invites reciprocal respect and makes difficult points in a graceful way.

  • While reframing every statement is not needed, it is useful for difficult conversations. Preparing possible reframings in advance can help think of the right framing in the moment. Reframing combines truthfulness with respecting the other party.

The passage discusses strategies for responding wisely when negotiating or dealing with difficult people. It recommends practicing reframing responses by roleplaying challenging scenarios and rehearsing different ways to respond calmly and respectfully.

Some key tips include:

  • Roleplay with a partner who throws blunt demands, allowing you to practice reframing under pressure.

  • Rehearse responses alone, visualizing hard tactics and crafting thoughtful, truthful responses.

  • Use the “Exactly! Challenge” to validate the other perspective before reframing your point of view.

  • Take a break if needed to compose yourself before responding.

  • Focus responses on interests, facts, and options rather than opinions whencaught off guard.

  • Keep responses “hard on the problem, soft on the person” to deescalate tensions.

It provides an example of someone named Stan successfully dealing with an explosive house sitter, Donna, by rehearsing responses and using reframed language to resolve the issue amicably.

The key strategies are rehearsing challenges in advance, slowing down reactions, focusing on understanding different perspectives, and reframing responses constructively rather than reactively. This allows one to navigate difficult discussions or negotiations calmly and find cooperative solutions.

Here is a summary of the key points about the persuasion tool called “If We Agree/If We Disagree”:

  • It works by showing the other person how agreeing with your proposal will serve their interests and benefit them, while disagreeing may hurt their interests.

  • It allows you to appeal to both someone’s hopes/upside of agreeing as well as their fears/downside of disagreeing, which can persuade different temperaments.

  • To use it, you first identify the other person’s interests, facts about the situation, and their potential worries or alternatives.

  • You then outline the benefits (“if we agree”) and potential problems (“if we disagree”) in a respectful, non-threatening way to bring the person to their “senses, not their knees”.

  • Tone is important - you are presenting potential outcomes as a partner, not an adversary.

  • Theodore Roosevelt Jr. famously used it in a letter to persuade his commander to let him participate in the D-Day invasion by outlining how his participation could help ensure success or create problems.

  • “You’re right” are two magic words that can also be used to turn resistance around by acknowledging the other’s perspective before still making your case.

So in summary, If We Agree/If We Disagree is a persuasion tool that appeals to both opportunities and concerns to gain agreement by respectfully aligning outcomes with the other person’s interests.

  • United Airlines Flight 173 was flying from Denver to Portland with Captain Malburn “Buddy” McBroom, an experienced pilot, in command.

  • While circling Portland due to a landing gear issue, the copilot and flight engineer noticed they were running low on fuel but McBroom remained focused on the landing gear problem.

  • The copilot and engineer repeatedly warned McBroom they were low on fuel and in danger of losing engines, but McBroom did not acknowledge the warnings until it was too late.

  • As predicted, the plane lost engines due to fuel starvation and crashed, killing 10 people including the flight engineer. McBroom was seriously injured.

The incident illustrates the importance and challenge of respectfully correcting a decision-making boss or authority figure when they appear to be making a serious mistake, especially when safety is at stake. Had the warnings about the low fuel been addressed sooner through clear and direct communication, the tragic crash may have been averted.

  • The crash of Flight 173 was initially mysterious, as the captain had extensive flight experience. The investigation revealed it was due to a “deference problem” - crews felt they couldn’t challenge the captain’s decisions.

  • This was a widespread issue in aviation at the time. Other crashes were attributed to copilots noticing problems but being unable or unwilling to directly communicate them to the captain.

  • In response, airlines introduced Crew Resource Management (CRM) training, which taught crews to work as a team. This included a protocol called APSO for copilots to safely raise issues to the captain.

  • APSO stood for Attention, Problem, Solution, OK? and provided a direct but respectful framework for communication. Its adoption improved crew collaboration and significantly reduced aviation accidents over subsequent decades.

  • The success of CRM/APSO led other high-stress industries like healthcare to adopt similar protocols to overcome deference problems between roles like doctors and nurses. Effective communication and challenging unsafe decisions respectfully can save lives.

  • Critical reflection and relationship skills like negotiation and consensus building are important leadership abilities, even in the military. The Nazis were concerned by Eisenhower’s ability to smooth over differences and adjust personalities.

  • When President Harry Truman was preparing to leave office and be replaced by Eisenhower, he laughed at the idea that Eisenhower would sit in the Oval Office and simply order people to “do this” or “do that” and have things happen.

  • Truman said that as president, his real power amounted to trying to persuade people through negotiation to do things they should be sensible enough to do without persuasion.

  • Political scientist Richard Neustadt was skeptical of this view at first but researched it and concluded Truman was right - the president rarely if ever successfully just announced decisions and had them carried out. Successful leadership requires negotiation and consensus building.

  • Relationship skills like negotiation, finding common interests, and bringing harmony are important for leadership even beyond the military, as leaders often do not have direct authority over others and must rely on persuasion and agreement to accomplish goals.

  • Effective leadership often involves negotiation and setting ground rules, not just issuing commands. Leaders commonly face having responsibility without full authority.

  • Simple discussion rules at the start of meetings can help improve engagement, listening, and decision-making in groups. This applies to both leadership situations and negotiations among equals.

  • The “Golden Minute” technique involves suggesting brief ground rules for constructive discussion during the first 60 seconds of a meeting. Sample rules include listening without interruption, speaking respectfully, and keeping each other on task.

  • Setting even simple ground rules can help turn hostility into harmony. Studies show fair processes lead to better commitment and problem-solving. Rules against multi-tasking also improve focus and understanding.

  • The author suggests using the Golden Minute technique when helping a struggling group, as a participant in negotiations, or in any challenging discussion. Doing so can guide the interaction to be more productive, even without a formal leadership role. Getting agreement on a constructive discussion process for just one minute can make a positive difference.

  • Two pregnant wives got into an argument and physical altercation on the sidewalk. Police referred them to mediation.

  • At mediation, ground rules were set including a “No Interruption” rule where each person speaks without being interrupted.

  • When each wife spoke, they tearfully expressed sorrow that their children would grow up not knowing their relatives. Their husbands tried to interrupt but were reminded of the no interruption rule.

  • Hearing the wives’ sorrow for the first time, the other wife also began weeping and expressed the same feelings when it was her turn to speak.

  • After everyone heard each other without interruption, the two couples ended up hugging and leaving arm in arm, resolved. The mediator was shaken by what just occurred through use of the no interruption rule.

  • The no interruption rule can also help bring agreements in places like Congress by preventing talking over each other. It allows all viewpoints to be fully heard.

  • Over 150 alumni from a course voted the Common Interests Hack as one of the three most popular concepts they learned.

  • A Common Interest is a shared goal that different people/groups can achieve by working together cooperatively. It’s something everyone wants that can be achieved through collaboration.

  • Appeals to common interests are a powerful way to unify people by showing them they are not adversaries and have more to gain from cooperation than conflict.

  • Examples are given of leaders throughout history effectively appealing to common interests in their speeches to unite divided groups, such as JFK appealing to unity against “common enemies” like tyranny and disease.

  • The Common Interests Hack is outlined as a simple formula for deploying appeals to common interests in conversations: shift focus to the common good, then say “If we work together, we can…” and name a specific, compelling, we-focused shared goal.

  • Examples are given of how the hack could be used to turn hostility into cooperation in scenarios like a divorcing couple resolving issues or a fighting young married couple dealing with money problems.

  • Including common interests as a separate category in planning frameworks like I FORESAW IT is recommended to bake the benefits of focusing on common interests into negotiations and problem-solving.

Here are a few key points about deciding with a notional BATNA:

  • A notional BATNA is used when you feel you have no real alternatives to the offer on the table, but need to decide wisely between accepting it or envisioning possible future choices.

  • It involves imagining potential alternatives even if they are not fully developed yet. This helps you evaluate the current offer objectively rather than feeling forced to accept.

  • Ben Franklin faced pressure to accept a dishonest article that would keep his struggling newspaper afloat. But he envisioned a notional BATNA of the newspaper potentially succeeding on its own merits over time if he maintained integrity.

  • Even if potential alternatives are not completely clear or developed, envisioning notional BATNAs helps shift your mindset from one of having no choice to one of actively considering options. This gives you the perspective and confidence to make wise decisions.

  • Developing notional BATNAs takes creativity - envision alternatives even if they are not fully formed yet. This thought exercise can produce insight into unexplored possibilities beyond just the offer on the table.

  • With a notional BATNA in mind, you can objectively evaluate the costs and benefits of the current offer compared to envisioned future scenarios, avoiding feeling forced to accept out of lack of alternatives.

Here is a summary of the key points about developing a Notional BATNA:

  • A Notional BATNA is meant to fill a gap when you have no true alternatives to an agreement currently, but anticipate better options may arise soon.

  • It involves three steps: 1) Guesstimating the value of future choices based on research. 2) Testing your risk tolerance by visualizing hopes and fears of different outcomes. 3) Getting input from someone with an opposite risk temperament to gain perspective.

  • The goal is to arrive at an “adjusted future best alternative” that represents your learning, risk tolerance (after testing your “heart”), and balanced input from others.

  • This estimated future alternative is then compared to any current offers to help decide whether to accept, negotiate further, or wait for better options.

  • Developing a Notional BATNA draws on similar practices of adjusting projections for uncertainty that are used in finance, business planning, and technology development.

  • The process is likened to Dorothy, the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion in The Wizard of Oz - using your brain, heart, and courage/perspective of others to make a balanced assessment.

Here is a summary of the key points about using a Notional BATNA:

  • A Notional BATNA is the estimated value of a likely future alternative to an agreement if the current negotiations do not result in an agreement. It is used when there is no clear existing BATNA.

  • Developing a Notional BATNA involves envisioning plausible alternative options that could reasonably arise in the future, and assigning an estimated value to them after adjusting for risk tolerance.

  • Comparing offers to both your true BATNA and Notional BATNA can provide a clearer perspective on whether the offers are strong or weak. A weak offer based on both comparisons may warrant pressing for more or potentially walking away.

  • The Notional BATNA is not meant to be an exact calculation, but rather an impressionistic way to better understand options and gauge negotiating strength. There is an art as well as a science to developing a meaningful Notional BATNA.

  • Once developed, a Notional BATNA can be integrated into other negotiating tools and planning like the I FORESAW IT framework, targets, and roleplaying to strengthen one’s position. But the Notional BATNA itself should not be disclosed to the other party.

  • Developing a Notional BATNA works best when done carefully with consideration of risks, discussion with others, and adjustment based on one’s risk tolerance rather than being a hopeful bluff. It aims to provide a meaningful alternative assessment, not justify an unrealistic one.

  • Jewel did her homework and understood the industry terms and concepts like advances, royalties, and recoupable expenses. She recognized that a large advance from a label like Atlantic Records could risk her having to pay back the full amount if her album did not sell well.

  • Kreayshawn, on the other hand, did not understand that Sony’s $1 million offer was actually a loan in the form of recoupable expenses. After her first album bombed, she earned only $0.01 in royalties and owed Sony the full $1 million advance she had spent.

  • Jewel negotiated a better deal where she took on little financial risk up front but would earn a large royalty if her album sold well. Her album became very successful, selling over 12 million copies, while Kreayshawn ended up owing Sony the full $1 million advance.

  • Jewel’s homework and understanding of the industry allowed her to recognize the risks in Atlantic’s initial offer and negotiate a better deal, while Kreayshawn did not understand the strings attached to Sony’s offer and ended up shouldering all the financial risk when her album failed commercially. Knowledge is key to negotiating good deals and avoiding traps.

  • The passage talks about various “tests” or ways to evaluate a potential business deal or offer to ensure it is favorable and does not contain any hidden risks or issues.

  • The first test discussed is WIN LOSE, which stands for What If, Incentives, Numbers, Lawyer, Other Side’s Expectations, and Look for traps or issues. This is presented as a tool to help identify any “time bombs” or problematic terms in an offer.

  • The second test is the Competitive Test, which involves comparing each part of the offer to the negotiator’s best and worst targets identified earlier. This helps evaluate if the deal splits value fairly between the parties.

  • The third test is the Relational Test, which has two parts. First, check the offer against independent benchmarks or criteria to see if terms are fair. Second, evaluate the quality of the relationship and trust between the parties for any warning signs.

  • The passage provides examples and context for each test. The overall message is that thoroughly evaluating an offer against these different criteria can help a negotiator ensure they are not accepting a deal that contains undisclosed risks or does not meet their objectives. Skipping these evaluation steps could lead to regretting an agreed deal later.

  • The passage discusses how to help save a struggling firm during a recession or economic downturn using negotiation skills and tools.

  • It cites an example of Noble Lithium, which was able to cut operating costs by 38% (equivalent to $100 million) during a recession by using negotiation training from Three Little Words, I FORESAW IT, and the TTT grid. This allowed them to both cut costs and invest for growth.

  • Their vendors came to actually like working with Noble Lithium despite price cuts, showing costs can be cut without bleeding suppliers.

  • The COO Todd attributed their success to using “Hard Data + Soft Skills” - gathering detailed cost data but negotiating with empathy and understanding suppliers’ perspectives.

  • Most companies focus too much on price haggling and assume price control is cost control, without understanding hidden supply chain costs.

  • The passage suggests tools like Three Little Words, I FORESAW IT, TTT grid, Common Interests approach, and Measures of Success could help firms negotiate recession challenges by cutting costs while maintaining good vendor relationships.

So in summary, it presents Noble Lithium as an example of how strategic negotiation skills and a collaborative approach can help a firm both survive and emerge stronger from an economic downturn by balancing cost cuts with investment and supplier relationships.

  • Noble Supply Chain faced challenges with isolating each supply contract negotiation without considering how it impacted other suppliers and costs elsewhere in the chain.

  • Todd, the new COO, took a different approach of bringing together a cross-functional team to take a holistic view of the supply chain.

  • The team created a dashboard to see how the terms of one contract affected others. They reviewed all existing contracts to identify unnecessary costs that could be negotiated away.

  • Todd told the team to treat suppliers as potential partners, not adversaries, and look for ways Noble and suppliers could help each other through creative trades.

  • Applying the negotiation framework of understanding interests, facts, and options, the team discovered suppliers needed cash due to the recession. Noble offered to finance suppliers’ equipment at low rates in exchange for large price cuts.

  • These innovative deals let Noble significantly cut costs and invest more in its operations, strengthening its financial position during the recession relative to competitors.

  • Other examples discuss how taking a collaborative, partnership approach with suppliers using a holistic view of interests and costs across a supply chain can generate billions in savings even for large companies.

  • P&G implemented a supply chain financing (SCF) program in the late 2000s that offered suppliers longer payment terms in exchange for discounts on invoices. This improved P&G’s cash flow significantly.

  • By 2015, hundreds of P&G’s suppliers had accepted the SCF program. It generated around $1 billion in increased cash flow for P&G by 2015 and $5 billion by 2019. Improved cash flow allows a company to more easily invest in its future.

  • Some concern that large companies could take advantage of small suppliers by pressuring them to extend payment terms. However, evidence suggests P&G took a transparent approach and some suppliers preferred its SCF program. Properly implemented SCF can benefit both buyers and suppliers.

  • In 2012, logistics company DHL faced losing 50% of its business when a major customer Intel exited a core business. Through collaborative negotiations using a method called “Three Little Words”, DHL and Intel found cost savings opportunities. This allowed DHL to improve margins by 14% and avoid collapse, winning a contract extension. Strategic partnerships through collaborative negotiations can help companies survive difficult economic conditions.

Here are some potential challenges that could arise in trying to implement a collaborative, negotiation-based approach to roaring out of recession or inflation, along with possible responses:

  • Lack of buy-in from leadership - Use tools like I FORESAW IT to understand leaders’ perspectives and identify their interests. Appeal to shared interests like minimizing layoffs. Suggest a pilot project to test the approach.

  • Resistance fromsiloed departments - Use negotiation tools to build cross-functional understanding. Emphasize shared goals and potential joint gains. Suggest starting with a small, cross-functional team.

  • Skepticism from counterparts - Lead with common interests like stability. Share facts showing it has worked for others. Use options like pilots to address uncertainty. Build rapport through active listening.

  • Perception of weakness in collaboration - Frame it not as compromising but as using creativity to expand the pie. Win-win negotiations require strength and skill. Highlight shared prosperity as the shared goal.

  • Complexity and time investment - Start simply to generate quick wins that demonstrate value. Simplify initial dashboards/tracking. Address time concerns by emphasizing long-term benefits ofstable relationships.

  • Lack of negotiation experience - Draw on negotiation ‘best practices’ like interest-based bargaining. Train teams in core concepts and tools. Bring in outside facilitation as needed. Lead by example with own negotiation skills.

The key is to proactively identify potential objections, address root causes of resistance, and offer solutions that balance multiple interests - all while keeping the shared goals of surviving recession/inflation front and center. Testing collaborative approaches on a small scale first can also help address uncertainty.

  • The passage discusses tools for negotiating difficult deals with suppliers or customers. It suggests (1) finding mutually beneficial but nonobvious deals, (2) keeping the deals confidential to avoid embarrassment or retaliation from competitors learning of them.

  • It then suggests (3) negotiating to use some of the savings from these deals to invest in research and development. The idea is that using some of the negotiated savings to fund new product development or process improvements could help the firm weather hard times.

  • The passage references the “I FORESAW IT” mnemonic as a tool to help convince leaders to support this negotiation strategy. It encourages thinking through how to approach leaders and which negotiation tools may help make the case. The overall message is to thoughtfully use negotiation tools and strategies to guide developing an argument to leaders.

  • The author thanks several people who gave them their starts in teaching negotiation and conflict management, including professors at various business schools. They say these individuals took chances on them and they are grateful, as their book would not have been possible without this support.

  • They thank current and former students for inspiring them and providing feedback over their decades of teaching.

  • Several scholars and experts in the field of negotiation and conflict management are thanked for mentorship and guidance early in the author’s career, including providing training, materials, and referrals.

  • Colleagues at various universities are thanked for feedback, collaboration, encouragement, and connecting the author with helpful interview subjects for the book.

  • Researchers who assisted with the book project are thanked.

  • Business leaders who were interviewed and provided real-world examples are thanked.

  • Attorneys, editors, and others who provided advice and support during the writing and publishing process are thanked.

In summary, the author expresses deep gratitude to many professors, students, scholars, colleagues, experts, and others who supported and inspired them over their career in teaching negotiation and conflict management, and specifically contributed to the creation of this book.

  • Practice using negotiation tools by roleplaying with a colleague. Provide each other with feedback on how the tools are used and how they could be improved.

  • Try using more than one tool during an important negotiation to see how the experience compares to working without tools.

  • Roleplay with an ally and intentionally use specific tools (e.g. bring a TTT grid). Ask for feedback on how you use the tool and how you can improve. Repeated practice is important for mastering tools.

  • Watch experienced negotiators in action and look for signs they are using ideas from the negotiation tools, even if they don’t explicitly refer to the tools. Ask them questions about how they approach specific elements of negotiation.

  • Conduct “postmortems” after negotiations by discussing with a colleague what went well, what didn’t, and what could be improved for next time. Consider how tools may help address weaknesses.

  • Teach negotiation tools to others. Preparing to teach helps strengthen one’s own understanding, and helping others learn is valuable.

  • Use tools to coach and train your entire organization, so negotiation skills become a core capability when teams use tools together.

The key aspects are practicing with tools through roleplaying, observing experienced negotiators, reviewing past negotiations, teaching tools to others, and implementing tools organization-wide for maximum impact. The goal is to continuously improve skills by applying, refining and spreading the use of tools.

Here is a summary of the key points about WATNA and BATNA from the negotiation framework:

(OP’s) BATNA - The Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement from the other party’s perspective. This is their best option if negotiations break down.

(Your) WATNA - Your Worst Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement. This is the worst possible outcome you would accept if negotiations break down.

It is important to consider both your BATNA and the OP’s BATNA when preparing for negotiations. Your BATNA sets the minimum you need to get from the negotiation, while understanding the OP’s BATNA can provide insight into their priorities and flexibility at the negotiating table. You want to ensure any agreement meets or exceeds your WATNA, while also considering trade-offs that improve upon the OP’s BATNA.

Developing quality alternatives helps establish a walkaway position and increases your negotiating leverage. It is also useful to be prepared with creative proposals in case negotiations reach an impasse.

Here is a summary of the provided text:

The text discusses using a checklist or “one-pager” when negotiating or problem solving to help keep you organized and on track. It cites examples of checklists used by astronauts, doctors, athletes, and military pilots. Checklists can be laminated for durability and quick reference in stressful situations. Being well prepared with a checklist approach could help negotiators explore options and avoid overlooking important factors. Overall, the text promotes having a handy “glance-and-go” play sheet or checklist as an effective negotiating tool.

Here is a summary of the key points without directly copying or reproducing copyrighted content:

The chapter discusses the importance of understanding a challenging counterpart’s underlying interests and perspectives in order to build trust and find mutually agreeable solutions. Effective communicators focus on actively listening, asking questions to gain insight, acknowledging others’ humanity, and separating people from problems. This helps uneasy situations become opportunities for cooperation instead of conflict. The example highlights how defusing tensions often means addressing core needs, confirming shared hopes, and appealing to our shared interests in dignity and progress for all. With patience and good faith, even major differences can become springboards for joint understanding and win-win outcomes that leave lasting positive change.

  1. Tools for Healthy Relationships (2015) discusses active listening as an important communication skill for building understanding and resolving conflicts in relationships. It emphasizes paying full attention without judgment and reflecting back what the other person said to ensure you understand their perspective.

  2. Alan Seid’s story about Marshall Rosenberg in a Palestinian refugee camp describes how Rosenberg was able to de-escalate tensions and change hostile interactions into cooperative problem-solving using nonviolent communication techniques.

  3. A 2015 journal article found that employees who perceive their supervisors as good listeners report lower emotional exhaustion, lower turnover intentions, and higher organizational citizenship behaviors. Active listening helps leaders understand subordinates’ messages and capture feedback fully.

  4. Army leadership doctrine recognizes the importance of listening to subordinates to make better plans and decisions. Active listening demonstrates receptiveness and helps build understanding within a leadership framework.

  5. Additional sources provide background on how active listening is used in various settings like community organizing, counseling, healthcare interactions and casual conversations to foster understanding. Studies show it can help groups reach consensus and aid in healing or recovery.

  6. De-Escalate by Douglas Noll (2017) provides tactics for calming an angry person quickly through active listening and avoiding power struggles or disagreements. Yoga, singing and reframing problems can also help improve mood and reduce conflict.

  • In the 1960 presidential election, John F. Kennedy defeated Richard Nixon by a narrow margin, receiving 34,108,157 votes (49.5% of the popular vote) to Nixon’s 34,108,157 votes (49.5% of the popular vote).

  • Kennedy’s famous inaugural address in 1961 inspired Americans with his call to “ask what you can do for your country.” The speech is still quoted and seen as inspirational 50 years later.

  • General Weygand called the fall of France in World War 2 “the battle of France.”

  • The summary referenced two authors, Rackham and Carlisle, but did not provide any specifics from their work.

  • It listed some potential “common interests” parties in a negotiation could claim but warned that some like “shift costs” or “profit at the other’s expense” are actually competing interests disguised as common interests. True common interests benefit both sides.

  • It provided examples of distinguishing true common interests from parallel or competing interests disguised as common interests.

The summary touches on several topics but does not provide much context or detail from the sources cited. It appears to be pulling out key names, dates and brief quotes/examples but without analyzing or interpreting the information in depth.

  • There have been questions raised about the ethics of large firms asking small/medium suppliers to extend payment terms. Both the US and EU have encouraged large firms to pay small suppliers promptly.

  • Whether supply chain finance (SCF) is ethical depends on the specific terms, rates, and risks borne by suppliers. It needs to take suppliers’ needs into account.

  • An article acknowledged the ethics question but viewed SCF somewhat positively, noting it can mitigate criticisms of large firms having high payment days outstanding.

  • Research supports SCF benefits but lack of practitioner information is a barrier to adoption. Studies show coordinated trade credit via SCF can financially sustain suppliers to mutual benefit, depending on information transparency.

  • U.S. programs to accelerate supplier payments through financing may have helped less than intended without also promoting affordable SCF solutions for smaller suppliers. Effective SCF requires cooperation from customer firms across functions.

  • While SCF research is abundant, two-thirds of global companies are hesitant to adopt due to unclear benefits for buyers and suppliers. Information gaps inhibit adoption. SCF handled well with supplier input can benefit both parties but requires effort.

Here are summaries of the key terms and concepts mentioned:

  • Recession: Refers to a period of temporary economic decline during which trade and industrial activity are reduced. The tools can help organizations cut costs and make strategic decisions to navigate difficult economic times.

  • Roleplay: Simulating real-life scenarios to prepare for negotiation or difficult conversations. It allows practicing communication skills and seeing situations from others’ perspectives.

  • Topics, Targets, and Tradeoffs (TTT) grid: A one-page chart used in the I FORESAW IT planning process to organize key information for a negotiation in a simple visual format. It outlines topics, aspirational and minimally acceptable targets, and tradeoffs to consider.

  • Who I FORESAW: The “Who” part of the I FORESAW IT mnemonic. Refers to identifying who has influence or power in a given situation and considering their priorities, agendas and potential objections.

  • WIN LOSE: A tool to help decide whether to accept a potential deal by assessing if it makes you truly better off (WIN) or risks leaving you worse off (LOSE) compared to your alternatives.

  • Winning Warmly: Focused on using empathy, ethical persuasion and common ground to get the best possible outcome rather than just “winning” at any cost.

  • You’re Right: A technique for agreeing with the other side for relationship-building purposes even if you don’t fully agree, to keep discussions harmonious.

  • checklist: Refers to using a Topics, Targets, and Tradeoffs (TTT) grid, which acts as a negotiation planning checklist.

  • roleplay, 100: Mentions using roleplay to practice important negotiation and difficult conversation scenarios.

Let me know if you need any part summarized in more detail.

  • Ccept an offer: Consider the other party’s interests and do a relational test to check how accepting the offer would impact the relationship long-term.

  • Time bombs: Watch out for aspects of offers that could blow up later like recoupable expenses or one-sided terms. Use the WIN-LOSE tool to spot potential time bombs.

  • Assuring other’s interests: When setting up meetings, make sure to understand and consider the other party’s interests and perspectives.

  • Godzilla in meetings: Roleplay difficult counterparties to prepare for how to handle them effectively in actual meetings.

  • Leading discussions: Establish clear rules upfront to facilitate productive discussions and make sure someone is assigned to take notes and summarize.

  • Relational test: Assess how accepting an offer would impact the relationship and trust between the parties in both the short and long-term.

  • Spotting time bombs: The WIN-LOSE tool can help identify aspects of offers that seem good initially but may turn negative later on.

  • Meetings: Consider location, facilitation, notetaking, roles, and rules to maximize effectiveness. Roleplaying counterparts helps preparation.

Here is a summary of the key parts requested from the passage:

  • Topics, Targets, and Tradeoffs (TTT) grid: A tool for systematically preparing for negotiations by identifying topics to discuss, desired targets or outcomes for each topic, and potential tradeoffs between topics. The passage provides examples and discusses how the TTT grid can be used, including for video conferences.

  • Who I FORESAW tool: A tool for developing a “Notional BATNA” (best alternative to a negotiated agreement) by identifying interests, options, who has influence, factual/financial research needed, sequencing of steps, etc. Helps build negotiating strength.

  • WIN LOSE tool: A tool aimed at helping negotiators identify whether an outcome would result in a “win” or “lose” for each side.

  • Winning Warmly: Approaches for initiating negotiations in a collaborative, problem-solving manner rather than a distributive, win-lose style. Includes cushioning first offers, using a “5% rule of thumb,” and being willing to be creative with options.

  • You’re Right tool: A tool for acknowledging the other side’s perspective to build rapport and trust.

  • Other key topics: recession/cost-cutting strategies, Notional BATNA, targets/tradeoffs grid example, triggers words, uniting via common interests, and walking away from offers.

  • Asking questions of the person you are helping can illuminate the problem by turning on the lights in a dark room. Questions help understand their perspective.

  • For a two-person team, filling out a full issue-by-issue negotiation plan together can help ensure they are aligned and prepared. But for larger teams, consolidating multiple plans may be too time-consuming and confusing.

  • It is usually not necessary or appropriate to send a detailed agenda for an informal, get-to-know-you conversation. More formal talks may warrant sharing an agenda in advance.

  • Later chapters will introduce tools like the “5 Percent Rule of Thumb” to help refine the ability to identify a wise negotiating target or goal.

  • Assigning numerical point values to reflect the relative importance or value of different issues can help identify beneficial trades, though most negotiators may not be that precise.

  • If issues cannot be numerically ranked, at least categorizing them as high, medium, or low priority still facilitates trades.

  • Reject offers that are worse than your bottom line on major issues, even if better on minor issues. Consider offers that give little on minor issues but meet your objectives on major issues.

  • The guidance can also apply to other negotiation methods like targeted negotiation.

  • Consider building support from colleagues by finding “champions” who can help persuade others, though forming internal coalitions requires special care.

  • Compassion and kindness are so important that powerful negotiation tools may not work without them. Bring humanity as well as method when applying any approach.

  • Appeal to the other party’s interests and alternatives to no agreement to build their motivation to say yes.

Author Photo

About Matheus Puppe