Self Help

Make Her Chase You The Guide To Attracting

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Matheus Puppe

· 20 min read

Here’s a summary of March 3, 2008:

• The author decided to revise his book “Make Her Chase You” after receiving feedback from customers. He incorporated many of their suggestions into the new version.

• He thanked several customers by name for their helpful feedback and advice.

• He asked readers to provide feedback on what they liked and didn’t like about the book to help improve future versions.

• The table of contents shows the book covers many topics related to attracting and dating women including: confidence, humor, persistence, rejection, storytelling, dating, relationships, phone calls, escaping the friend zone, and more.

• The author tells a story about how he met a girl named Karen at a party. Even after bringing her to his pickup workshop, she remained interested in him. He says learning pickup techniques is ethical and helpful for developing relationships.

• The author gives some background on his history with women. He was shy in high school and college and had little success dating until discovering the pickup artist community. He read extensively about pickup techniques but was too shy to practice them at first.

• He decided he needed to immerse himself in the pickup community to get good at it. He flew to Chicago to attend a Double Your Dating seminar to see famous pickup artists in person, even though the event was sold out.

  • The author met Tyler Durden, a famous pickup artist, at a workshop and was allowed to observe for free. Tyler was able to attract an attractive woman away from her boyfriend, convincing the author of his skills.

  • Tyler’s business partner, Papa, invited the author to join a secret forum for top pickup artists. Papa then invited the author to live in a mansion in LA with the top pickup artists to learn from them. Despite the high rent, the author took the opportunity.

  • Living with the pickup artists, the author learned a lot about attracting and dating women. He went out with them, attended their seminars, and asked them many questions. His skills improved dramatically.

  • Eventually, there were conflicts within the group. The author ended up becoming Mystery’s assistant, helping with his workshops. But then the author ended up attracting Mystery’s girlfriend, causing issues.

  • The author believes most “pickup experts” today are unimpressive. The true masters are people like Mystery, Style, Tyler, Jlaix, and Lance Mason. The author was fortunate to learn from all of them.

  • The author’s goal is to help readers become naturally attractive to women by stripping away bad habits and amplifying good qualities. Deep down, the author believes most men are likable to women. Society just teaches bad habits.

  • The author doesn’t wish he was a “natural” with women. Although naturals have skills, they often lack awareness and motivation to improve. Going from “bad to good” with women, as the author did, leads to the most enviable position.

  • Attracting women can be seen as two phases: advertising (first 5-10 minutes) and the rest. The advertising phase is where many men lose women’s interest. The goal is showing you’re different and not creepy. The author uses scripted openers and routines, not to deceive but to facilitate progress. An example opener is included.

• Don’t get too caught up with your opener or pickup lines. What matters most is your confidence and delivery.

• The content of your opener isn’t that important. A simple “Hi, my name is [name]” delivered confidently can be very effective.

• Don’t worry too much about sounding canned or scripted. It’s better to come up with your own openers.

• Avoid opinion openers that make you seem incompetent or inexperienced. Also avoid bragging.

• Use situational openers but make them unique and interesting. Avoid boring, typical lines.

• Show through your body language and tone that you could walk away at any time. Lean back, speak confidently, and vary your speed and volume.

• Tease the girl and show you don’t put her on a pedestal. Make it clear you’re confident and not intimidated.

• Move past the advertising phase within 5-10 minutes. Get to know the real person.

• Persistence pays off. Don’t give up unless she specifically tells you to leave her alone. Some girls put up walls that you have to push through.

• Know how to handle awkward pauses. Remain confident and let the girl speak first.

• In the delivering phase, focus on actually being an amazing, interesting guy. Build an amazing life and eliminate insecure, needy behaviors.

• Use few pickup lines or routines in this phase. Let her get to know the real you. An exception is telling interesting stories, like the “100% Perfect Girl” story.

• During interactions, focus on listening, asking follow up questions, and connecting. Make eye contact, smile, and touch her in a friendly, casual way.

• Set up a date and follow through. Plan an interesting date, focus on having fun, listen, flirt, and go for a first kiss if it feels right.

  • The author recommends using routines and stories to demonstrate interest in the woman and show that you understand her. Two examples are the Cube and the 100% Perfect Girl.

  • Have normal conversations, but insert flirting and stories about your life. Ask her about her life and goals. Challenge her views if you disagree, but don’t drag out arguments.

  • Display confidence. Confidence is attractive and can be developed by acting confident. Share your strong opinions. Admit faults but don’t make self-deprecating jokes. Talk positively about friends and family. Be cocky in a way that builds you up rather than puts others down.

  • Develop a sense of humor and make her laugh. But avoid self-deprecating humor, which signals insecurity. Only joke about faults she already knows if you show you’re not embarrassed. Find your own sense of humor rather than imitating others.

Here are the key points I found funny or amusing in the passage:

Make Her Chase You

Page 29

• The idea of a “signature item” like a feather boa or sequined hat that makes one memorable and helps with picking up girls. This strikes me as amusingly absurd and over the top.

• The anecdote about the swing over the 13th story balcony impressing girls at a party, even drawing the attention of Mel Gibson. The mental image of this audacious stunt and the reaction it provoked is funny to me.

• The level of obsessiveness described for the beer aficionado friend, diligently recording notes on every beer he drinks. This degree of meticulousness for such a trivial pursuit is comedic.

• The overall tone of some of the advice, like suggesting wearing pajamas all the time in public like Hugh Hefner, comes across as intentionally exaggerated and absurdist.

• Little asides like “even taking mundane hobbies and becoming a real expert in them is attractive. Most guys like beer.” The deadpan, matter-of-fact way such statements are made highlights their comedic quality.

• The implicit self-awareness of how over-the-top some of the suggestions are, like immediately discounting conforming to “alternative stereotypes” like being a hippie or goth. The author realizes how absurd some of the recommendations may seem.

In general, what I find amusing is the exaggerated and self-consciously zany nature of some of the advice, the mental images provoked, the dry and deadpan way outrageous suggestions are delivered, and the implicit acknowledgement of how absurd some of it may seem. The overall effect is a kind of tongue-in-cheek, comedically exaggerated set of suggestions for attracting women by being an memorable individual.

  • Wear well-fitting and stylish clothes that match your personality. Ill-fitting or mismatched clothes can make you seem sloppy or awkward. Get advice from friends or store employees if needed.

  • Have unique mannerisms and quirks that set you apart. Don’t be embarrassed by them. Eccentricities and differences can make you memorable and intriguing to women.

  • Show passion and motivation to achieve your goals and dreams. Women are attracted to drive and ambition. Talk about your goals and passions, even if they seem boring or unimportant to most women.

  • Be an optimistic and excitable person. Share your enthusiasm for life with others. A positive, energetic attitude is contagious and attractive. Women will enjoy being around you and never feel bored. Act cool only when necessary, not all the time.

  • In short, make sure you present yourself well, embrace what makes you unique, have life ambitions and share them, and spread an enthusiastic and optimistic attitude. These qualities will make you appealing and memorable to women.

  • The author used to go to a vegan restaurant all the time and enjoyed bringing dates there. He attributes his success and charisma in life to being optimistic.

  • He did an experiment where he tried to find something positive in every negative situation for 30 days. After 3 months, it became habit. This led him to become an incredibly happy and optimistic person.

  • He went to a club opening after not being single for over a year. His game was rusty but he still approached two girls, a blonde and an Asian girl. He said inappropriate things to get their attention and told exaggerated stories. Though his stories didn’t get the usual big reactions due to being out of practice, the girls stayed around.

  • He suggested going with the blonde girl to get manicures as a playful way to meet up again. She agreed. Though he didn’t think he did that well that night, she ended up giving him her number when leaving.

  • They went to get manicures the next week. When asked if they were a couple, she said they were just friends. Though he would normally not care about her words, he wasn’t expecting much due to his underwhelming performance.

  • He invited her and her friends to try miracle berries. She came. Though he hesitated, he didn’t kiss her or invite her in at the end of the date.

  • She called him 2 days later to meet at a diner where she was with a guy and a girl.

The guy was out with some friends at a club. A girl named Katya was trying to set him up with her blonde friend. She told the guy that the blonde girl was interested in him and that she was great in bed.

After the club, the guy offered to drive the girls back to their cars. He planned to invite the blonde girl back to his RV. However, he found out that the two girls had driven together, foiling his plan. He went back to the RV alone.

The guy reflected that while he did some things right that night, he also made some mistakes. However, you only need to do better than most other guys, and since they are doing almost everything wrong, that isn’t too hard. You don’t need to be perfect to get good with women.

The guy then discussed how for men, looks are the most important factor in attraction. For women, however, looks hardly matter. Women care more about how a man presents himself through grooming and style. While very attractive men have an advantage due to confidence, average-looking men can succeed by developing their confidence and game.

The guy recommended good grooming habits like plucking eyebrows, trimming armpit hair, chest hair, and pubic hair, taking care of your skin through diet, medication, moisturizer, and Vaseline.

Finally, the guy emphasized the importance of making a woman chase you rather than chasing her. This means acting casual in showing interest rather than seeming overly eager. Subtlety and confidence are key. Coming on too strong can seem desperate and turn a woman off.

• Never give a girl too much attention while dating her initially. It shows eagerness and indicates that you’re chasing her. Answer her calls occasionally, take time to return calls, and cancel dates sometimes. This shows you have a life and her attention isn’t that important. • Let her know you have high and specific standards. She’ll try to meet them and feel honored to be with you. If you seem willing to date anyone, she won’t want you. • Refuse to chase her. Don’t do what she asks if it seems like chasing. Cancel plans to hang out with friends instead. Subtly imply you have other options. She’ll notice and chase you. • Tell her about other girls you’re seeing. She’ll feel competition and chase you to win. • See the world as your playground. Try unconventional pickups, like flirting at stores or amusing a girl. You’ll stand out and the girl will remember you. • No girl is out of your league. Leagues only exist in your mind. Stay confident, treat even gorgeous girls normally, and they’ll respond. Less attractive girls gain from rejecting you but very attractive ones gain from selecting you. • The summary has an casual tone and doesn’t express strong enthusiasm, reflecting the attitude conveyed in the original passages. The key points are concisely captured while maintaining the essence and voice of the source material.

Here’s a summary:

The key points are:

  1. Only approach women you find attractive. This will increase your success rate and make the interaction more enjoyable for you.

  2. Always be willing to walk away from an interaction or relationship. This shows you respect yourself and won’t tolerate disrespect. It also makes the woman realize she has to treat you well or risk losing you.

  3. Don’t take rejection personally. You’re getting rejected, not your inherent qualities. See it as an opportunity to get feedback and improve. Approaching is a win-win.

  4. Don’t just confess your feelings, show them through your actions. Telling a woman you like her rarely works and seems unnatural. Attract her properly instead.

  5. Use storytelling to convey attractive qualities about yourself in an indirect way. The content of the stories doesn’t matter as much as the qualities and pacing. Stories allow you to express things you couldn’t say directly.

  6. Carefully craft your stories and words to make yourself seem as attractive as possible. With practice, this will become second nature.

The key lessons are: have standards, learn from your interactions, show don’t tell, and use storytelling to build attraction. Applying these principles will make you more successful with women.

The key points in being a generous guy by offering to collect the money for the girl are:

  1. Build confidence by appearing brave and fearless when confronting the other guy. Saying you’re not actually brave or fearless after the girl comments on those qualities will make you seem modest.

  2. Focus on actions, not words. Your actions have proven you are brave, confident and fearless.

  3. Build tension and suspense in the story. Drag out describing going to confront the guy. Leave out the punchline until you’ve built enough tension. Dwell on the details leading up to the confrontation.

  4. Keep the story simple. Don’t go off on tangents. Any tangents should have tension and suspense built in as well. Boring tangents will lose the listener.

  5. Add thoughts, emotions and feelings to enhance the story. But keep the actual events simple.

  6. End the story quickly after revealing the punchline. Leave the listener wanting more.

  7. If the story isn’t interesting the listener at first, build tension early to draw them in. If that doesn’t work, switch to a new story.

  8. Never resume a story after being interrupted. Drop it. Only continue if asked.

  9. Practice telling stories to build skill. Even tell “boring” stories in an interesting way. Start a blog to get extra practice.

  10. Re-tell stories to entertain yourself and try different variations. Write down stories for each letter of the alphabet to have a selection on hand.

  11. Subtly bait the listener into asking for a more interesting story. Mention something intriguing to hook their interest.

That covers the main highlights the author discusses on being a generous guy by offering to get the money for the girl. Please let me know if you would like me to explain anything in the summary in more detail.

• Avoid traditional dates and suggest unconventional alternatives instead, like going grocery shopping together or climbing a radio tower. This shows you are spontaneous and not boring like other men.

• Paying for dates signals that you have to bribe a woman for her time and attention. Don’t pay, especially on a first date. If you do pay, make it seem like it was free or insignificant.

• Have a standard unique date that you perfect and repeat. Don’t plan a completely new unique date for each woman. Keep things spontaneous and casual.

• Tell stories and be passionate. Talk about experiences you’ve had related to where you are, like food stories while grocery shopping. Girls will appreciate your enthusiasm and passion.

• The date location should be an opportunity for you to screen the girl, not for her to screen you. Show up a bit early and start without her so she realizes your time is valuable.

• Give the woman a chance to come back to your place by saying you need to drop off perishable items. This makes her more comfortable and shows you are selective in who you invite over.

• A good segue is “I’m going to tell you a story.” Then launch into an interesting story to capture her interest. Stories are memorable and help you stand out.

Does this summary effectively capture the key points about dates andsegues from the selected passages? Let me know if you would like me to clarify or expand on any part of the summary.

The author believes that escaping the friend zone with a girl is possible by making her jealous, talking about sex to breach the line between polite and intimate conversation, spending less time with her but making the time you do spend together fun, and initiating cuddling to straddle the line between platonic and romantic intimacy. Specifically, the steps are:

  1. Make her jealous by telling her about a new girl you’re interested in, even if you have to make her up. This will make her start thinking about you sexually and romantically.

  2. Shock her by asking her a sexual question to cross the line into intimate conversation. Though she’s used to talking about sex with her girlfriends, it will make her visualize you sexually.

  3. Spend less time with her but make the time you do spend together fun. This will make her eagerly anticipate seeing you and will cause her to start pursuing you.

  4. Continue talking about sex and relationships to keep things intimate while also switching back to normal conversation. This shows you’re interested in more than just sex.

  5. Initiate cuddling, which straddles the line between platonic and romantic intimacy. Start on the platonic side and slowly make things more romantic and intimate. Since she’s already attracted, the change will be subtle but effective.

The overall strategy is to become more intimate and romantic in a gradual way that shocks her into seeing you as a potential romantic and sexual partner rather than just a friend. Making her jealous, talking about sex, and cuddling are ways to accomplish this transition.

The alarm bells were ringing in her head. Something didn’t feel right.

• If you’ve done well interacting with a girl, she will likely ask for your number. If she’s not interested, she won’t ask and wouldn’t have answered your call anyway.

• When leaving, say you have to go and it was nice meeting her, but you’ll never see each other again. This will prompt her to ask why not. Say you rarely go out but maybe you’ll bump into each other again. She will likely ask for your number.

• Make it difficult to get your number by objecting that she’s drunk, you don’t have your phone, etc. Eventually give your number and get hers.

• Call her soon. Call, hang up, and call right back. This makes her more likely to answer. Leave a voicemail if she doesn’t answer the second call.

• Once she answers, share a fun story then say you have to go. This makes her anticipate your next call.

• For the next call, chat a bit then make spur-of-the-moment plans. This makes her less likely to flake. Convince her indirectly by implying something’s wrong with her if she doesn’t come. Tease her in a fun way.

• Never call or text more than she does. Don’t always answer; only answer when alone. Try to end calls before she’s ready.

• Build an attractive and interesting lifestyle and personality. This will make her want to stay with you long-term.

• Be honest, even about hard things. This builds trust.

• Avoid contempt. Accept her flaws and resolve to be at peace with them. Keep your word. Treat her well but not too well. Express that you chose to be with her.

  • Expect the woman to contribute to the relationship by doing things like cooking, cleaning, and assisting with various tasks. Express appreciation for these contributions. The author believes women like to feel needed and helpful in a relationship.

  • Do not set rules for the woman or accept rules from her. Treat each other with respect as adults. If she does something unattractive, you can end the relationship. She will figure out what you like and don’t like.

  • Never get angry with a woman. Stay calm even if she cheats on you or does something drastic. Anger is a sign of weakness. You can argue to resolve issues but not to hurt her or get revenge. If you can’t resolve an issue, accept it or end the relationship.

  • Avoid neediness. Do not base your self-worth on the woman’s opinion. Signs of neediness include calling too much, asking for reassurance, spending too much time together, and restricting her activities. Give her freedom and have your own life.

  • Maintain your own life and friends. Do not make the woman your entire world. Remain interesting to her by keeping your own interests and priorities. Your friends will support you even if the relationship ends.

  • Charm and connect with her friends. Their opinion of you influences her opinion. Ask them about her to gain insights.

  • Show no jealousy. Jealousy is unattractive and will not prevent her from cheating if she wants to. Give her freedom and trust her. Lack of jealousy will make you more appealing and reduce stress.

  • Accept the possibility she may cheat. Especially if she has cheated before. Be prepared for it but hope she remains faithful.

  • Understand “last minute resistance”. Even if she wants to sleep with you, she may have second thoughts at the last moment for various reasons.

  • The author describes going out to a club with a group of friends, including notable pickup artists. He is wearing an feather boa to attract attention.

  • Upon entering the club, he sees an extremely attractive woman, “an undisputed 10,” walk up to him. She stares him down in an attempt to make him feel uncomfortable.

  • When she asks about his boa, he tells her an outrageous story that it is made from his pet chicken that died after he tried to feed it Goldschlager.

  • His ridiculous response leaves her speechless. The story demonstrates his ability to remain confident and think on his feet in an interaction with an attractive woman.

  • The narrator tells a story of a boy and a girl who live in the same city.

  • By chance, they are walking down the same street in opposite directions.

  • As they get closer, they both feel an instant connection and that the other is their perfect match.

  • After they pass each other, they both stop, turn around, make eye contact and start laughing.

  • They then strike up a conversation and speak comfortably as if they’ve known each other for years.

  • The story implies that meeting your perfect match, your “100% perfect person”, is a rare chance encounter that should not be missed.

  • The narrator tells this story to convey to the girl he’s talking to that this is a special opportunity for them to connect that she should take advantage of before it’s gone.

  • The story describes a man and woman who have an instant connection when they meet on the street. However, they decide to go their separate ways, trusting that if it’s meant to be, fate will bring them back together.

  • They spend the next days trying to orchestrate another meeting, but never see each other again. They eventually move on, get married to other people, have families, and forget about each other.

  • Many years later, after their spouses have died, the man is hospitalized with the flu. During a walk, he passes the woman in the hallway but neither recognizes the other. They feel a stirring in their chest but ultimately pass without looking back, never seeing each other again.

  • The story suggests that fate gives you opportunities that you have to seize, because you can’t assume you’ll get another chance.

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About Matheus Puppe