Self Help

The Strength in Our Scars (Bianca Sparacin

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Matheus Puppe

· 11 min read
  • The passage is from the 2018 book by Bianca Sparacino, published by Thought Catalog Books.

  • The author discusses contrast and beauty in both light and dark, hope and hurt, rise and fall. She believes in people who have been broken but remain hopeful.

  • The world gives both beauty and pain, and pain can be a gift. Loss can set you free.

  • It’s hard to move on from relationships, but you should look at the memories and sacrifices, then rebuild yourself stronger. Your body and heart have been through a lot, but you can inspire and stimulate people.

  • You built walls to protect yourself but have the ability to tear them down. Goodbye is hard because you can’t forget someone, but not all relationships are meant to last forever. Some teach you how to love, some teach you not to settle.

  • Feel what you’re feeling instead of suppressing it. Be thankful for the memories and moments that remind you of past love.

  • People leave for many reasons, not because they don’t love you. Often due to their own past hurts, familial relationships, fear of commitment or loss.

  • How someone makes you feel says more about them than you. Don’t stay with someone who makes you feel unworthy of love.

  • We avoid connection but seek it. It’s okay to be emotional, vulnerable and human. That creates depth in relationships.

  • We use “fate” as an excuse for walking away from people, but fate doesn’t exist - only effort does. If it was meant to be, we would have fought for it.

  • Collect inspiring moments to help you survive hard times. The sun will rise again.

The passage encourages the reader to find hope and light even in times of darkness. It suggests that healing comes from forgiveness, not from forgetting. It emphasizes that self-worth is not defined by what others think or past hurts. Everyone is worthy and needed. Do not close yourself off to happiness by being guarded. Stay open to it. You can love again after being hurt, because you know how courageous it is to share one’s soul. Do not feel ashamed of what you need to do to survive. You are not destroyed by what has hurt you. You survived. If you care for someone, make them a priority. Show up for them. Let them know you care through action, not just words. Love them fully or let them go. You choose your own happiness. Stay true to yourself. Love will come in time. Do not rush self-growth. People who broke you cannot put you back together. Find self-love. Lose yourself in the world, not in another person or relationship. Be gentle with yourself; you are still learning. To heal, understand your pain. Whisper to yourself that it will be okay.

Some people burn with passion and hope. Do not hide that. Show the world. You deserve to take up space. Own who you are. Do not let others decide your worth. Express yourself. Everything is temporary, so appreciate what gives you purpose. One day you will meet someone who sees your wounds and loves you still. Some days courage is simply waking up and continuing on. There is courage to be found in small acts.

  • Sometimes courage means gradually healing from hardship and heartbreak. It means continuing to move forward even when you want to give up.
  • Love someone who will nurture your soul, mind, and heart, including the messy and chaotic parts of you. Let love change you for the better.
  • Focus on things that inspire you and make you feel alive to fall back in love with yourself. Forgive yourself for past mistakes and for not believing you deserved better.
  • To move on from someone leaving, acknowledge the pain but work to cleanse yourself of them. Cry if you need to, then close the door on them. You will heal.
  • Hope that you find happiness on your own terms, pursue your passions, find a supportive love, accept yourself, have breathtaking moments, travel, connect with friends, and create a life you don’t want a break from.

The summary outlines finding courage through gradual healing, loving fully and being loved in return, rediscovering purpose and self-love through focused inspiration, moving on from loss through a cleansing grieving process, and hoping for a fulfilling life overall. The sentiment seems to center around personal growth, acceptance, meaningful connections, and intentional living.

  • Live spontaneously and fully experience life. Feel deeply and embrace all that life has to offer.

  • Find yourself and learn to love who you are becoming. Learn to appreciate where you are in life.

  • Love the messiness of life and accept confusion. Do not hold back.

  • Your interests and what matters to you are valid. Do not give up on your goals and dreams.

  • You will make mistakes but you can grow from them. Do not let them define you. Forgive yourself.

  • You will heal and feel better. Do not fight struggles alone. Let others who love you help.

  • You do not need someone else to make you whole. You can build yourself up. But the right person will still choose to love you, even at your worst.

  • Be someone who cares deeply. Be vulnerable and open. Take chances on love, even if you may get hurt. The hurt will not last but the what ifs will.

  • Do not become bitter if someone hurts you. Do not hurt others in return.

  • It is okay to miss someone who is gone. Accept they are gone but know you will heal and be happy again. Wish them the best.

  • Moving on means accepting loss and endings, even if they were once meaningful. But be grateful you had the experience at all.

  • To find the right one, become the right one. Focus on your own growth and journey.

  • Find happiness in small moments and the simple things. Make time for whatever brings you joy.

Find meaning in small things - The way the sky looks, the comfort of coffee, a sunrise. These small moments can save you.

Some kind souls have endured much hardship but still love deeply. They are in awe of life despite their pain.

We often search for love in others before finding it in ourselves. But self-love is foundational.

To survive, believe in small acts of love - A phone call, seeing loved ones, following your passions. Believe you can overcome hardship and be happy.

You deserve love - From others and yourself. You deserve happiness, inspiration, and to be who you want to be.

Don’t fear the messiness of healing and growth. Unpack your pains. You are not broken but becoming.

Hope to find love in all areas of life - Sunrises, laughter, favorite songs and places, self-love, and relationships. Love is everything around you.

Things worth doing ignite passion and move you. If it’s not for you, let it go.

You change, the world doesn’t. You grow stronger and better at managing darkness and chaos.

Sometimes love changes. Let go of what you can’t control. Love yourself and know you are worthy. You will survive and heal.

Learn to be human. Forgive, accept loss, appreciate beauty, and heal voids within yourself. Experience life in the light and dark. Accept where you are and believe in who you’re becoming.

The love within yourself is forever.

Ask if loving someone was worth the hurt. If you’d do it again, you found something rare and beautiful, worth the fight. Don’t doubt its meaning.

Life moves and confuses us. Experience inspiration and confusion. Love and lose people, stay up late talking, travel far, forgive hard things. You will laugh, cry, hurt and heal. Be bad and make mistakes. Find closure or keep beauty alive. This unpredictable life is yours.

Though life can be messy and painful, you will survive. Don’t break your own heart trying to please others. Express your feelings without worrying about being too much. Love deeply and fully, even if it means getting hurt. Have hope, envision a better future, and work to make your life something you’re proud of. Learn to love yourself. There are still good people in the world, so keep believing in them. Let go of past hurts and people who didn’t love you back. Walking away can be an act of strength and self-care. Be gentle with others, as everyone is facing struggles you can’t see. Focus on finding yourself before finding a soul mate. Growth is difficult but rewarding. You are not defined by your struggles. Those who love deeply also hurt deeply, often loving the wrong people. But their ability to love so fully is a gift.

  • People who love deeply pour themselves into others and give unconditionally without asking for anything in return. However, the recipients of their love often take advantage of them and discard them when they are done. These deep lovers have a hard time leaving unhealthy relationships because they always hope they can help the other person reach their potential. They are left haunted by the feeling that they were not good enough.

  • You will never figure life out completely or have a perfect existence. But you can figure out how to move forward, surround yourself with good people, do work you find meaningful, learn to say no, forgive others, accept life as it comes, and live fully despite difficulties and imperfections.

  • It is important to take risks in life, pursue your dreams, and live fully. Do not let fear hold you back. Embrace life and make the most of the time you have.

  • Healing is a messy, nonlinear process. It involves digging into painful experiences, facing fears, asking hard questions, and learning to rebuild. Progress will come and go in waves. But over time, as you process through the pain, you will become free.

  • There are others who feel deeply and struggle in similar ways. Find your tribe - they will understand you and support you. Know that you will survive hard times, find peace, and be able to look back on your growth. Happiness comes from within, not from what others do or material success.

  • While relationships can be meaningful, the end of one is difficult. Remember the challenges as well as the good parts. There are more great people out there, so open yourself up to finding a love you deserve.

  • Pay attention to what really stirs your passion and happiness from within. Follow that.

Focus on the things that bring you joy and make you feel alive. Pay attention to the moments that make you laugh or smile, that give you hope, and make you feel understood. Figure out what interests and challenges you, what makes you want to grow as a person. Notice the life you want to build for yourself and pursue the things that fulfill you, whether it’s a job, hobby, person, or place.

Remember that you will have good days and bad days. Some days you will feel confident in the person you have become, other days you will feel regret for past mistakes. But if you work to heal, learn from your experiences, and become a better person, you can feel proud of who you are. You can find contentment by embracing life fully, taking chances, nurturing relationships, and achieving hard-won growth.

Appreciate how far you’ve come in your journey. Looking back, you will realize you overcame struggles that once seemed insurmountable. Though life is difficult, you will learn and grow. Stay determined and keep moving forward. Find people who support you. One day, you will wake up feeling happy and at peace.

Learn to love yourself like you love others. Forgive yourself for imperfections and past mistakes. Fight for yourself with the same intensity you show others. Your brokenness made you who you are, so make peace with your imperfections and past pain. Only then can you find true healing.

A soulmate will not complete you but inspire you to complete yourself. A soulmate supports you unconditionally, motivates you to grow, and loves you so deeply that you believe in yourself again. But ultimately, you alone must resurrect your heart through self-forgiveness and self-love. Anger and resentment will not heal you; you must accept what you cannot change and make peace with your past.

Choose to lead a life driven by love rather than fear. Have compassion for others and embrace gentleness - it shows inner strength, not weakness. If you are always there for people, know that you have a rare gift, but be sure to save some of that nurturing spirit for yourself. You deserve love too.

• Know that you give people hope and make them feel valued. But remember that you are human and need rest. You cannot save everyone or carry the weight of the world. Invest in yourself.

• You are here to live fully and discover what moves you. Find your purpose and surround yourself with people who inspire you. If you lose yourself, have the courage to start over.

• Choose someone who chooses you and supports you through challenges. Love should make life easier, not harder. Don’t settle for less.

• Allow yourself to be loved and seen for who you are. That is an act of self-love.

• You have overcome difficulties before and will do so again. You have the strength within to save yourself. Remember that.

• You cannot make someone love you. Accept what is and move forward.

• Feel your feelings. Give them space and be gentle with yourself. Growth happens gradually in quiet moments.

• Happiness comes from within, not from outside things. It is something you become.

• Timing is not the issue. Compatibility is what matters in relationships.

• Happiness feels light and free, like your heart can finally float.

• Life moves on. People and circumstances change. But we continue living and rediscovering meaning.

• Written by Bianca Sparacino to inspire and uplift you.

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About Matheus Puppe